I Want To Believe

by ComputerBob

May 22, 2008

In the nearly 10 years since I first created ComputerBob.com, I've tried to avoid writing anything about politics, and in fact, have probably only mentioned the subject 3 or 4 times in total. Today, I'm making a very special exception to that rule.

Yesterday, my wife and I got up really early and made a trip to Tampa, to hear Senator Barack Obama speak. We got to the St. Pete Times Forum three hours before he was scheduled to speak — which turned out to be four hours before he actually spoke. We had to walk so far to get to the back of the line that I wondered if the stadium was going to "be full" before we even got up to the front of the line, but once we got in and found great seats only 12 rows off of the floor, I looked around the filling stadium and realized that we had actually been in the front 10% of the line, which had eventually wound its way all the way around the immense property.

Unlike the vast majority of the crowd, which wore its support on its sleeve — or more accurately, on the front of its T-shirts — I attended not as a "believer," but as a skeptical observer.

Obama's campaign slogan is "Change we can believe in." Every time I hear or see it, a tiny Frasier Crane part of my mind snipes that, to be grammatically correct, it should be "Change in which we can believe." Grammar aside, polls have long confirmed that the vast majority of Americans are dissatisfied with the political status quo, so Obama's messages of change, hope and working together to solve the country's problems have struck a chord with many voters this year. That's due in large part to his very credible communication skills and likable, seemingly approachable personality. Here's what he looked like on the stadium's giant LCD screen, and here's the view of him from our seats.

Even after hearing yesterday's speech, I'm still undecided as to who I'm going to vote for in this presidential race. On the one hand, I have very strongly held beliefs, values and vision for America, so of course I would like to vote for someone who shares all of them. On the other hand, I'm willing to vote for someone with whom I disagree on several important specific issues, if I think that I can trust them to do what they think is best for the whole country, basing their actions on core beliefs, values and vision that don't severely contradict my own. The latter is exactly what I'm going to have to do this year.

I don't fully agree with either John McCain's or Barack Obama's beliefs, values or vision for America. Each of them stands for important things that I strongly agree with (with which I strongly believe?), but each of them also stands for other important things that I disagree with in varying degrees. With no clear tie-breaker in sight, I suspect that I will eventually vote for whichever candidate I think has done a better job of earning my trust — or has done a better job of not losing it.

Lack of trust is why I could never vote for the third candidate. For years, I've seen her as a highly intelligent but extremely cynical, political chameleon and disingenous, self-serving opportunist. And during the past 15 months of the current campaign, I've developed a very strong impression that, in contrast to Obama's campaign slogan, hers should be "Beliefs that change to fit the situation." So it doesn't matter if I agree with anything that she says, because I just don't believe her.

That's why it really bothers me that there appear to be an increasing number of pundits calling for Sen. Obama to offer her a "consolation prize" — either the vice-presidency or a lifetime appointment to the U.S. Supreme Court — in exchange for the support of her voters. I want to believe in positive change and I want to trust Sen. Obama, but I don't trust her at all, so if he made her any such offer, I would consider it to be a return to the cyncial "politics-as-usual" policies of the past, and a complete betrayal of my trust.

Of course, these are just my opinions and impressions, and I could be totally wrong about all three candidates. As always, your mileage may vary.