How To Be A Friend To Victims Of Abuse By A Partner
adapted from Northwest Assistance Ministries, Houston, Texas
Educate yourself about the myths and facts of abuse and share the information.
- Express your concern and support them.
- Practice active listening techniques.
- Let them make their own decisions and accept their decisions as right for them at this time.
- Don't judge their decisions.
- Be calm when discussing the issues.
- Recognize and praise the good qualities and strengths you see. It takes strength to survive and cope.
- Tell them they did not cuase and do not deserve the abuse.
- Tell them they cannot limit or stop the abuse.
- Encourage them to be who they want to be.
- Help them clarify their feelings.
- Never condone the abuse; state your belief that no one deserves to be beaten.
- Don't be a mediator.
- Encourage them to confide in a trusted adult if you believe the situation is getting worse.
- Be aware that violence escalates in frequency and severity.
- Recommend professional help if the situation is serious.
- Remember, you can't rescue them if they aren't ready to be helped.
- Understand that getting out takes time.
- Never put yourself in a dangerous situation with the victim's partner. It may encourage your friend to discount the
danger that both of you are in.
- Tell them that battery in an intimate relationship, is against the law.
