When You Say "I'm Sorry"

by Herb Vander Lugt

From 'Our Daily Bread -- For Personal and Family Devotions'

August 22, 2003

Published by RBC Ministries, Grand Rapids, Michigan

With tears in his eyes, a man said to me, "I told my wife I was sorry, but she says she won't continue to live with me. First John 1:9 says that God forgives us when we confess our sins. Please talk to her and tell her that if God forgives, she should too."

I knew this man had "repented" several times before, only to revert to his abusive behavior. So I said, "No, I'm not going to tell her that. In your case, saying, 'I'm sorry' isn't enough." His wife insisted that he receive counseling and give evidence of a genuine change before returning home. She was right.

Just saying "I'm sorry" is not enough for God either. The leaders of Israel, in the face of trouble brought on by their sin, thought that merely returning to prescribed sacrificial offerings would solve their problems. But God rejected that kind of "repentance." It was as fleeting as "a morning cloud" and "the early dew" that fades away with the first rays of sunlight (Hosea 6:4).

Merely saying "I'm sorry" is no different than the empty rituals of the Israelites. God said, "I desire mercy and not sacrifice, and the knowledge of God more than burnt offerings" (v.6). He meant that repentance must result in a change of heart and a change of behavior. That's "godly sorrow" (2 Corinthians 7:10).

Repentance is to leave the sin
That we had loved before,
And showing we are grieved by it
By doing it no more. --Anon.